You may have a dirty mind but great minds think alike. Yes, these buildings really do look like what you think they look like. Take a look, you know you want to.
The Gherkin, London
It may just be that they have incredibly dirty minds or something awful happened to them when they are children, but believe it or not, a lot of people think that The Gherkin, in the City of London, is shaped like the appendage of the male of the species. Opened in 2004 it stands erect at 180 meters - which is some size, you have to admit.
Its address is 30 St Mary's Axe. Some axe, Mary! If you don't think it has a certain shape to it you are perhaps in the minority. Other nicknames for this huge beast of a building are the Crystal Phallus, and the Towering Innuendo. The building is also famous for it incredible shafts. There are gaps on each floor which form six of them and naturally ventilate the entire building.
Ypsilanti Water Tower
Michigan in the United States is the next stop on our tour of these buildings. Had it been made of trees it could have been said that it really had wood, but the locals have a much more endearing - if straightforward - name for the structure. They call it the ‘Brick Dick' and who can blame them. A certain Mister Freud may well have had a field day with the subconscious mind of the architect and it is a matter of sympathy when one considers what the builders must have gone through in the construction of this monster. Supposedly if anyone from the Eastern Michigan University graduates while still a virgin the tower will fall down. Obviously, then, an overwhelmingly large amount of married couples must attend the university. Cough.
The Williamsburg Savings Bank Tower
It is unfortunate for this noble building that its name may be shortened to something a little lewd and unforgivable, so whether or not you believe that the Williamsburg Savings Bank Tower in Brooklyn, New York City looks like a willy, that is its nick-name. The gilded copper dome at its summit isn't something that has helped with the perseverance of this appendage-driven assignation either. It is still, despite its age, the tallest building in Brooklyn - and quite an eyeful it is too.
Kansas City: Liberty Memorial
Declared a National Historic Monument of the USA in 2006, the Liberty Memorial in Kansas City is certainly monumental. Built to commemorate the First World War it was opened in 1926 and has been sticking out like a sore thumb ever since. One can only wonder, whether the Planning Committee were simply too polite to mention this obvious when the architect of the building presented them with his vision.
The Torre Agbar
Thrusting upwards on the skyline of Barcelona, Spain and simply dripping in glans like glamour is the Torre Agbar. It was inaugurated by the King of Spain in September 2005 and its shape and size has been likened to the Erotic Gherkin of Old London Town. A big shimmery vibration of light, at night the tower glistens wonderfully and casts its light across the city of Gaudi (who would approve, perhaps?).
The one thing that, well, sticks out about the Torre Agbar are the thousands upon thousands of LED devices. These allow images to be illuminated on the façade of the building at night and it is one of Barcelona's newest and most colorful attractions as well as being the head office of the local water board.
Montreal Olympic Stadium
1976 was a good year for willy shaped buildings, with the opening of the Montreal Olympic Stadium which was the host for that year's Summer Olympics. It is locally given the nickname ‘The Big O' for its donut shaped roof but the Canadians could just have easily opted for the next letter in the alphabet.
Alas, it has had many problems over the years, both structural and financial. It is generally seen as something of a white elephant - and even one of those mighty beasts might be proud to be the owner of this not so august semi-erection. However, at 175 meters it is still the world's tallest inclined tower.
The Lurie Tower
A bell tower sneaks on to the list. The Lurie Tower is in Michigan and located at the eponymously named university. It was built in 1996 and rather than being one of those feeble latter day bell towers actually houses a grand carillon among its sixty bells. As there are only twenty three of these big bells in the world (two of which are on this campus alone) this may be the bell end of the world you might wish to visit some day, particularly if you are a campanologist. Wait a minute, this is the second Michigan entry in this selection. Does that say anything?
IFC 2 Hong Kong
The International Finance Centre (known as IFC unsurprisingly) consists if two skyscrapers, number two being the largest. It is also the tallest building in Hong Kong. The airport express is situated directly below it. One of the tallest office structures in the world this of course bears no resemblance at all to anything remotely to do with... why am I bothering at this stage?
Do you know of any building that fits the bill?